Lowsec Lols and Shitty Videos

Two weeks since last update... *feels the cold gaze of the ceo on his shoulders*


Lets see, we've gotten a lot of new members lately very much thanks to The Pimp's hard work, who is now also taking a well deserved break. A few newbies, a few veterans, even more danes - it's all good.

Our killboard is... ugh... well it's has seen better days. We've recently decided to take a more active role in lowsec seeing as our roaming gangs tend to either find ourselves horribly overblobbed or, if we're lucky, only able to find some poor newbs/alts to kill. So far Solar Wing, which is kind of a training/pet alliance for Solar Fleet, the big blob in eastern part of eve, has welcomed us kindly by murdering us and they seem to already control the lowsec planets in the area of space we've looking to have fun in :( - But as always, Plantains prevail!


In other news we had a small Minecraft tournament sort of thing a while ago and we happened to record some of it, which we've put up on Youtube.
It's completely unedited so might be pretty boring to watch - It's pretty much just us talking and killing each other, so I guess it would make for good fapping material. Not all of it is up yet, but here are the two current videos:

Enjoy the fapping you pervs :d

Recruiter of the Month

Just a small update to celebrate our Recruiter of the Month, Tetsuga Tsyung!

Below is an artist's (and by artist we mean person experimenting in Photoshop) depiction of the glorious Plantains Pimp, as is his official title now.

Le Pimp de Plantains

Well done friend, enjoy the price! :D

And Who Could Forget Dear Ratboy?

We in Plantains are very proud of our dear and glorious leader who has lead us through countless dangers and each time managed, through the use of clever self sacrificing tactics involving leaving a newly joined member behind to save his own ass/Stilet.... I mean the rest of the fleet.

A close bond of trust exists between us and we've always there for each other should we need a shoulder to cry on, a bed to sleep in, a fireplace to lie in front of naked while eating grapes, and other wholesome activities for strappy young men. Discretion is a matter of honour and we trust each not to take advantage of or make fun of personal stories and anecdotes shared between our members.

.....

HAHAHAHAHA just kidding.


Anyway our CEO finally found himself job:

In other news it seems that our very popular and highly relevant link to the full series of the amazing My Little Pony show has finally been taken from YouTube, seeing as the mayor entertainment corporations refusal to adapt to reality. While this is of course a serious blow to corp morale, we have "top men" working day and night to try and track down another source of Pony goodness.

Meanwhile the powerful Danish faction of the corp decided this would be an ideal time to spread Danish culture beyond the borders, to try and civilize the other lesser races within the corp. We hope you'll enjoy it.


The Plantains Bureau of Propaganda

We're Still Here and We're Still Queer!

So it's been a little while since the last blog post which was about our little skirmish with an elite lowsec entity that didn't like to see small "noob corps" humiliate them as we apparently did. We went on a few tours into their space but every time we came close to their system to play they were always waiting with huge amounts of ships ready to bait us. These guys wanted revenge really bad and because of some rookie mistakes we lost a few ships.

It was pretty clear to us that we weren't going to find much fun here simply because of the sheer amount of enemies waiting for us every time we logged on. So we decided to move our PvP staging system to another region to meet some new people. And that's where we've been hanging out since then, although at a lower activity level.


As usual we've also been playing some Minecraft, bit of LoL, some Total War games and whatever else of interest we could find.

The one thing that EVE does really well is that it forces people to find together and play together, because of the, some would say brutal, difficulty, very high learning curve, and the general intelligence and patience requirements required to be able to get anywhere in the game. It's not a game that's supposed to be played alone. That is a good thing.

As I've mentioned before the first and most important goal of our corp is that we get to know each other. Not just because it's much more fun to play together, but rather because it is absolutely essential for building a corp able to survive in the EVE universe and able to last more than a few months without dying of inactivity and leadership burnout.


I'm guess I'm getting all serious now, but my basic point is just that having 3 games plus EVE to play with your lovely corpmates when you're not doing PvP, Incursions, Missions etc is probably the best, most optimal, and generally just the most fun way to get the most out of EVE Online.


TL:DR We love each other <3

What Is This Thing Called Rage?

So I was in the middle of writing a lengthier post about various corp lowsec roams, about lessons learned, and I even have a recording of one of infamous drunken roams...

But as I came home from bossing people around at work our beloved leader and ceo linked me to the comment section of our most recent kill, still struggling to hold back his laughter. Now I promise ill link to the killmail in a little while, but if you'll forgive me I'd like to be a bit sentimental for just a moment:


Our lovely corp has been growing quite steadily for a while; our members are all very active, people are having fun playing not just EVE but also several other games together, and we're generally just having a great fun time together talking about gay sex and other interesting subjects on mumble, while killing other people and each other all through the night til we EU ppl have to head to work without having gotten any sleep.

While we of course consider ourselves to be amazing pvp gods and care deeply about our absolutely terrible kill efficiency, we curiously haven't yet gotten any real attention from other corps yet..

Until now!


A merry band of bold adventures, myself not included (fuck work!), went into lowsec to find some fun and get the official corp Godfather, Sudds, to finally try out some pvp, after having evaded for such a long time. A proper battlereport is under way, but the end result was two dead Assault Frigates, which to some might be insignificant, to us was amazing, and to others was something worth crying and raging over. And boy was there rage!



Mad Guy 1: For a good laugh check out the l33t niggas on battleclinic ~

Mad Guy 2: FUCKING LOOOOOOOL   fags

Plantainer 1: Sure is some rage over an AF.

Plantainer 2: so are we mad cause you were killed by a *lol* fleet lol lol lol....... I said Biiiiiiitch!!!!!! 

Mad Guy 1: I would expect scrubs to quote the shitty version of Dave Chappelle... Fuck Yo Couch!

Linky


Reading various forums related to EVE it has always puzzled me why alliances like Goonswarm and PL were able to get so much enjoyment out of, as they say, making people cry and rage, either by killing miners in highsec or blobbing people with Titans, but this event has taught me what a wonderful feeling seeing others rage, whine, and cry over your actions can be.


It's really is just so much fun seeing how a simple baiting tactic and the loss of a few pretty cheap ships can get people so riled up.


In conclusion, while we in Plantains are by no means at the same level as PL or Goonswarm in regards to gathering tears, I'd still like to try and reply to all the concerns presented to us in the comments of that killmail:

Cya in lowsec o/

Incursions and Minecrafting

It has been a little while since the last update, so since the real life workload has finally lifted I thought it would be a good time for a little update on what we've been doing.


Incursions

For anyone who's been paying attention to EVE matters, there's been a growing demand that the income of Incursions be nerfed as to many people the risk vs. reward ratio of the 10man Incursions called Vanguards was screwed up, and people were able to amass large amounts of ISK in relatively short time.

This caught our attention and we decided in the interest of science to go and check out this so-called ISK heaven. And my did the lord shine upon us!

A few of us have so far tried them out, and it appears the rumours are true. Incursions does not only pay well, they are also quite fun and interesting to do; with the proper fleet set-ups of course. Our goal and hope is that we can get a full Plantains Incursions fleet up and running, and hopefully be able to replace lvl 4 mission grinding with chill Incursions running instead.

Our ship replacement program has so far been financed by mission running taxes, but if we can switch that over to Incursion running instead, grinding ISK should go from relative tediousness - we do mission in groups usually and joke on mumble meanwhile, but the joy of your corp mates companionship can only do so much to an arguably pretty boring game feature.


Being able to run Incursions together, make lots of money, and then hop into lowsec to have fun while joking and chatting on mumble, is probably closest to the most fun you can have in EVE. And that's where we'd like to go :)


Minecraft

So we're of course still playing this lovely game, but unfortunately our old server got wiped while the host tried to resolve some lag issues. So we started over and have been doing quite well so far. We've managed to lure even more corp m8s to come play with us, so we're almost at server limit now. 

Anyway, have some screenshots of some of the things we're built so far.

Sudds underwater cottage

Tk's lovely house

Draco's Boat

Pandi's Parthenon

We live quite a way apart, primarily to make sure we all have enough room to expand and be creative, but since our infrastructure of minecart rails is not yet completely set up; it does take a long time to get to each other. So the above were just the things closest to my continent.


Will write down a proper post about what we've been up to pvp wise soon.

o/

Drunken Lowsec Roam

Just a quick update seeing as I have tons of work.

Some days ago a few people decided to get drunk and go to lowsec and have fun. I couldn't be there myself, so had to rely on what little information the three involved could remember.

We hired a skilled artist to try and put together the different stories into one epic tale of courage and skill:

An epic tale! - click for larger version

A toast to our first of hopefully many future drunken roams. Well done guys.

First Blood

In spite of the lack of action on our first low sec roam we decided to try out again, but this time we would try and find some foes more likely to come out and engage us. We also felt that preying and trying to provoke EVE Uni was perhaps not the most noble thing to do, considering their are basically a learning institution.

So you'd think we instead would try and find a new slightly less populated part of lowsec to try and find some other smaller corps closer to our size, but seeing as we don't tend to do the most logical thing, we went to find the almost exact opposite of what the space close to Aldrat had to offer.

We went to Amamake instead.

Amamake is, as you can see below, a choke-point between high- and lowsec, a place where many EVE players try and travel through every day. The system is inhabited by a certain pvp corp called Heretic Army which is probably one of the most successful pvp corps in the whole game - maybe not the most skilled ones, but they certainly do get lots of kills, both against defenseless newbies and veteran pvp gangs.

Anyway despite a certain persons warnings; "those guys fucking live there, lets just go anywhere but there" we decided to try our luck.

Fleet composition was: Drake (Pandi) , Retribution (Pinka), Rupture (Azrael) and a Rapier (Draco). We jumped into the system and went to a safe spot. Everyone but the Rapier stayed there and we started spamming our d-scasn to look out for probes. There were lots of people from Heretic Army in local of course and we could see plenty of ships on our scanners as well.

After a little while Scanner Probes were launched by someone who was not us, and because we were really slow to react we soon found about 9 enemies jumping onto our face. Draco was already gone, Azrael managed to get away, but Pandi and Pinka were stuck and tried to fight off the hordes.

The result, however, was predictable: Link and Link.

Draco and Azrael were still alive however, and they decided to at least try and get one kill to avenge their fallen brothers, and consequently jumped in and overheated everything to kill off a lowly Thrasher:

Success! - Not a spectacular kill, but it at least meant we had not lost the other ships for nothing.

Artist's depiction of the battle

So yea first kill for Plantains. Our kill/loss efficiency is of course in the gutter, but at least it's not at 0%, which pleases us greatly.

Laters o/

First Lowsec Action!

While missions can of course be a thrilling activity we decided it was time for us to get on with some pvp, and not just Minecraft TNT wars, but instead some actual EVE-style pvp.

And so we set set sails towards the fabled land of lowsec, with our glorious leader Draco leading the small band of suicidal swashbucklers towards glory!

Captain Draco planning his/her next move!

Fleet composition ranged from a Tristan (obviously just to fool our enemies!) to a battleship with the rest in between both in terms of cost, size, and viability. In Plantains we like to try and throw off our enemies by using fleet compositions that so-called experts would most likely call "retarded" but which we like to think of as bold and innovative.

Seven people decided that coming along would probably be more fun than missioning, re-watching My Little Pony, improving their knitting skills, failing to satisfy their gf/wife's needs etc. It would basically serve as a nice distraction their usual daily activities.

Below is a picture of all the strappy seamen taken just before the departure from our PvP base:

Front row from left to right : Unoinmul, tk, Tobias, Draco, Pinka, Pandi, Octavious - The men in the back are our tennis partners who felt like cheering us on.

With such an intimidating force it was no surprise that no enemies dared to engage us. We spent most of the time trying to lure some EVE Uni Freshmen and Graduates to come out of their station and fight us, but seeing as our whole fleet was in the system they refused to take the bait.

Time passed and local continued to rise in numbers, and we soon found 20 EVE Uni folks in the system including the fleet commander of the ILN, several ILN grunts and quite a few Graduates. It was clear they were planning use their well-known Human Wave tactic against us, meant to overwhelm their opponents with superior numbers.

We decided to take off and try our luck elsewhere, but in spite of our clever :CLASSIFIED: tactic we were unable to get any action and eventually decided to go home.

And that pretty much concludes the first Plantains lowsec roam. In spite of the lack of action we still decided to go celebrate it down at to local Gallente Steel Mill, seeing as it was milestone for the corp, albeit a fairly tame one:

Picture from the party:

Draco and tk leading on!

Gj everyone! :D

Missions and Minecraft

In EVE we've primarily been missioning together in the last few weeks, trying to increase the size of the corp wallet to be able to fulfill our plan of buying ships for our never members so they can try out PvP without having to worry too much about losing everything.

We've recruited a few more people to the corp, and is of course still looking for more, so if you're an EU or EST resident feel free to join the public channel and ask any questions you might have.

Apart from EVE we've been playing little game called Minecraft together. So since pictures of us killing Angel pirates and finishing missions isn't the most interesting thing in the world, I just took a few pics of what we've built on our Minecraft server so far. Enjoy:

Overview of our server

Pandi's Tower

Draco's Lil Castle

Tk's Cavern

Sudds' Farm

Pandi's Parthenon (under construction ofc)

Not spectacular so far, but we're enjoying it immensely. All members of Plantains are of course more than welcome to join us :)

It's Alive!

The corporation is now up and running!

We have been busy little bees already. We have our forums up, with a lovely background sure to make even the most bitter person's mouth fill up with water.

Killboard is up too! Nothing on there so far, but we're confident our efficiency will soon be dropping like Draco's pants when he's down on the playground. Just kidding!

Mumble is up and running and the lame jokes, constant sexual innuendo, and deep philosophical discussions are already in full swing. We love you Sudds.

Recruitment thread on the official forum is up too.


Since creation people have primarily been moving stuff around and doing missions/leaching standing of each other together like proper corp mates.